The French TV Show

On a TF1 (French TV network) broadcast which was going out to the lovely French public live, the show is called "Les amours" (The Lovers).

The general plot is that three couples come on to the programme, the girls flit off set, and the lads get asked a series of questions. The girls then come back and get asked the same questions, and for every right answer they get six points. On this one night, off go the girls, and the presenter starts to ask the questions.

First one up... "Not meaning to be too crude, but when did you last have sex?"

The bloke goes a bit red, the audience starts to chuckle, and there's a silence as the bloke decides to spit it out and go for the points. "This morning" comes the response to a huge roar of appreciation from the crowd.

"OK, next question" pipes up the presenter, "Whilst we're on the subject...where?".

The bloke now goes bright red and cringes in his chair, the crowd goes wild with laughter, and eventually the guy answers "In the kitchen".

The crowd loves it, and tries to suppress the laughter as the girl comes back on..

"So," the presenter starts off, "When did you last have sex?"

The woman goes as red as a lobster, her partner reassures her saying it's OK as he's already answered it, the crowd chuckles. "This morning" comes the reply to a huge scream from the audience, followed by silence.

"And where did you do it?" This time the woman is really struggling, her parents are sitting in the front row, and don't forget it was live, and everyone they knew was watching but again is reassured by her man that he has already answered. So she replies, "Up the arse."

You can imagine the huge silence.

A True Story!

Australian Police have been unable to recommend a prosecution for the following scam:-

A company takes out a newspaper advertisement claiming to be able to supply imported hard core pornographic videos. As their prices seem reasonable, people place orders and make payments via cheque.

After several weeks, the company writes back explaining that under the present law they are unable to supply the materials and do not wish\tab to be prosecuted. So they return their customers money in the form of a company cheque. However, due to the name of the company, few people ever bother to present these to their banks. The name? 'The Anal Sex and Fetish Perversion Company'.